What do you do when your friends want to eat out and then split the bill, even when you know they’re going to order a lot more than you?
Splitting the Bill – Eating Out With Friends
Many readers have asked about how to handle eating out with friends. Some of the questions are:
“What do I say when friends want to eat out a lot as a way to socialize but we don’t have the money to do that?”
“What do I say when my friends want to go out to eat but they never pay their share?”
“What do you do when your group wants to “split” the bill but the portion they ask you to pay is way higher than what you actually spent?” In one case the person said they spent about $20 but when the bill was split up it came to $91 per person! Wow!
“What do you do when a friend brings a coupon for Buy One Get One Meal Free and they want their meal free because you purchased yours?”
Well, here is what I would say:
“I’m sorry but I’m not going to be eating out today (or this week, month or whatever)”. If you still go out, I would ask ahead of time “Do you have your wallet and money?”
When ordering, say, “I would like my own check please.”
“Oh great! A coupon! …So we can SPLIT the cost of lunch.”
These may seem like simple responses but keep it short and sweet with no explanation needed. It’s your money and there is no reason for you to be paying for others’ meals.
Tawra
The day you start spending your money unemotionally is the day you will start having control of it. The above comments are perfect examples of how we spend money emotionally. We don’t want to be embarrassed and we worry about what others think about us so we spend money we don’t have.
Get your emotions under control, stop worrying about what others think, get some self respect and self confidence. I was the worlds worse in this area but when things got so bad that I lost everything I got over my embarrassment real fast because it became a matter of survival. The problem is as long as we have even one credit card to charge we aren’t in survival mode and won’t change. Just something to think about.
Jill
Photo By: Alastair Vance
Thank you for advice on eating out with a group. About 2 times a year my DH family gets together at a nice restaurant for a meal. My BIL usually has a few drinks with his meal. My DH and I don’t drink alcohol. I have felt justified with having a dessert even when BIL complains about it. WHAT IS THIS NONSENSE!!! Yes, NONSENSE. I am constantly struggling with my weight. I was only hurting myself with dessert. Separate checks right at the beginning is a real good idea. I would even guess that BIL would not have his usual 3-4 alcoholic drinks if he had to pay for his own drinks. The hardest part is to convince DH. Wish me luck.
Thanks again. Regards, Peg
This is such a good question – and good advice. I recently took my two boys to a pizza place with the older one’s basketball team. After splitting cost for a bunch of pizzas, I ended up paying eighteen dollars – and the three of us ate less than the lady across from me who paid $6 – because she was only one person. It was so unfair, and I will never get caught doing that again.
This also happened to a few of us who were included in a lunch group from work. We got zapped with a larger, and unfair, portion of the bill because the others had a few alcoholic drinks. I didn’t say anything then but if I found myself in this situation again I would speak up and decline to pay more than what I ate, plus tip.
I have no shame in declining invitations to dine out. Although we can afford to do this more frequently, we chose a frugal lifestyle and consider eating out frequently a waste of money that I can use elsewhere.
We always make sure to ask for separate checks. Works out well each time.
i’ve been in situations like this in the past myself .. here are 3 examples of what they were: ..
once, one time i was invited and when everyone said to split the cost of the check so many ways .. i told the people i was with i only had so much to work with and bc i was ordering a kids meal (that was all i could afford), i was going to pay for my own meal .. i also stressed again that was the only money i had on hand .. (kid’s meals are somewhat huge so i normally like to order them anyway) ..
another time, i was dining and i got to the table late so of course i got to order last .. adn after being told lunch was going to be split up, asked what everyone had ordered .. after i found out everyone ordered these large meals and drinks (some alcoholic some not) .. i then said i had only enuff money for the soup/salad special and ordered a glass of water on a separate check .. and yes i got many dirty looks but that was all i wanted to pay for .. no more no less ..
another time.. b4 we got to the restaurant.. my brother (b4 he died), sis in law and i only had so much to work with for the 3 of us (this was when i was a single mother) .. so we bought 2 meals.. drank water and split the bill up 3 ways .. the 2 meals were the same exact thing .. it came with a soup and salad as well so we gave my brother the soup and sis in law and i split the salad .. and it worked out fine .. got a few funny looks but that is what we did ..
sometimes its nice to go out with a group of people but i like the idea of asking for my own check ..
the only other time i dont do this is when i go out with my kids .. we all chip in equally .. (we also order basically the same thing and if someone orders a more expensive meal or more drinks than that person picks up the difference.. thats the only fair thing to do and no we dont ask them to do this .. they do it naturally .. ) ..
:D
I love how we do it at work. A group of us (10-15 people) all go out to the same restaurant about once a month. We share a google doc between us. If you are coming you add your order beside your name to the google doc. It is faxed over to the restaurant around 11am. When we get there our drinks come out and they just call us by name and hand them to us. Then meals come out the same way, but name.
Then all the bills come out the same way right after the meal so we can pay while eating, by name. It is so simple and that many people are in and out in an hour every time even with paying running 10-15 credit cards. So smooth!
its very coincidental you posted this blog .. just recently my daughter said a friend of the family has a hard time paying for “their” portion of the bill .. it is always clearly understood that each one pays for their meals/drinks/tip/taxes.. they do not ever ask for separate checks ..
my daughter said she cant keep paying part of this person’s bill .. she enjoys her company and asked what i thought she should do ..
i told her to be very honest and frank with her .. let this person know she can either stop fussing about paying for her bill or they can ask for separate checks or dont invite her anymore ..
my daughter likes this person’s company and well they have been friends for a super long time ..
i told my daughter, friends or no friends .. everyone pays their own way .. and if she really cant afford something and you do want to treat her, then do what i do .. tell everyone order from the $1 menu (this is what i do) and if you want something extra, cough up the rest (and its clearly understood what the “rest” is .. drinks, taxes, tips) ..
we like to go to denny’s and well, they have a new menu there .. you can order off the $2, $4, $6, and $8 menu . lots ot choose from .. and it is nice to go out for a treat but not flip for the whole bill ..
my daughter said she didnt want to offend this person and i told her she wouldnt be offending her if she was truthful and honest and if this person got all huffy and puffy and mean than she really wasnt a true friend ..
*do you think i gave the correct advice?* ..
rose ..
Yes you did Rose. Actually I usually don’t discuss it even. When the waitress comes to order before anything is said or anyone else can say anything, I just say “We will need two tickets please.” and pretty much leave it at that. There is no discussion. That puts the ball in their court because if they say “No I want 1 ticket” they make themselves look pretty tacky and most people aren’t that brazen. They usually like to be more subtle about being tacky if that makes sense.
best advice on the subject so far. totally clever and non-offensive. thanks!
Daughter went out for dinner with group of friends. She had very little money. Daughter had a shrimp cocktail because that is all she could afford. When they totaled up the bill, she was told she owed $36. She went to the friends husband who had done the figuring and told him she could not afford that much. He said “Well that is what it is.” Daughter did not stick up for herself and had to pay $36 for a shrimp cocktail on her credit card. That was no ‘friend’. Very disappointed in daughter. Talked with her and I don’t think that would happen again. I always ask for separate checks because others drink; I do not and I do not want to pay for another persons alcohol. Have dealt with alcoholism in family and feel very strongly about it.
When you have more money, as the friend and her husband do, they don’t think about the financial situation of others. Sad.
Too bad the daughter didn’t think to ask for a copy of the menu so she could prove the shrimp cocktail wasn’t $36.00. But obviously those people were taking advantage of her. I hope she has better friends now. Asking for separate checks especially in a large group is always the way to go. There is always going to be somebody who doesn’t want pay their full share.
How sad that some ‘friends’ even make an issue of splitting checks when eating out. Unless I am treating a friend to lunch, or a friend treating me, I always just say right up front that we need separate checks. None of my friends or co-workers have ever made an issue of it. Like Jill said, most people won’t say anything. If they do, they aren’t a true friend.
I am on a budget now and have been on a much tighter budget in the past. I have always felt that my tight finances are not the business of anyone else. I have never felt the need to explain to anyone why I couldn’t eat out or why I couldn’t order certain things.
Sometimes we let people make us feel bad or guilty if we don’t do certain things and we should not. We just have to learn to say no sometimes and not worry. We really don’t owe people as many explanations as we sometimes feel that we do.
In the office I work at, the ladies do a girls’ night out to a nice restaurant about once every month. I have never attended in almost 20 years of employment. For one thing, I usually don’t have that kind of extra money in my budget. For another thing, I see these ladies every day at work and I don’t want to travel 30 – 60 minutes with them to a restaurant after work, eat and then travel back and get home late. When I’m done working, I want to go home to my family. That’s just my preference and I have always politely declined. Some months they don’t even ask anymore and that’s okay. I’ve never told them I don’t have the money or that I don’t want to spend time outside of work with them. I don’t really need to explain. I’m always friendly at work with them and that’s all that is needed.
Sometimes on a rainy day someone at work will suggest going together and having pizza delivered so no one has to go out in the rain. In that case, we determine how many want to chip in on pizza, how many pizzas we need and split it between all of us equally. Yes, some people eat more than others but we usually get good deals on pizza and it usually comes out to $3 – $4 per person which isn’t too bad if the money is in ones’ budget. I have done this a few times. And believe it or not, sometimes there was not even an extra $3 in my budget and when approached I simply said “No thank you” and ate my leftovers I had packed for lunch. No explanations necessary.
Every now and then I do go out for lunch with co-workers. If I am asked to go for lunch, I always consider where they say they are going and if I have the money for that. Sometimes it is to Wendy’s and I have a few dollars and order a hamburger and fries off the dollar menu and get water and spend less than $3. My co-workers have never commented about me eating on the cheap, even if they order $10 worth of food. We all have a favorite Mexican Restaurant and I sometimes go out to eat with co-workers there for lunch. Depending on how much money I have, I may order a special and water or order less. One time, I just wanted to go out and eat with a co-worker to talk over lunch but only had $6. I accepted her invitation to eat Mexican. You get free chips and salsa there so we munched on that. Then I ordered a burrito off the side order menu…it was just like the burrito I usually get in the bigger meal, only it didn’t come with rice and beans on the side. It was only $2.50 versus $5.95 for the full meal. I ordered water and paid right under $3, left a tip and still had a full belly. My co-worker didn’t even notice that I ordered less. There is a slight language barrier at that restaurant and we sometimes get only one check even thought separate ones are requested. I always take the check to the cashier and say “I had _________” and they give me total. No questions asked or explanations necesarry. :)
One thing I have done when I didn’t have money to go out with people is get really creative and make plans to see them while spending less money. My mom and dad like to go to the movies a lot and we don’t have money for that in our budget often. I check out new DVD release from the library for free, buy a box of microwave popcorn and some candy and invite my parents over for movie night. Sometimes I have suggested things like just going out for an ice cream cone or something little with someone if I didn’t have the money to eat a meal out. Or ask someone to go for a walk with me to talk instead of going out for a meal or expensive activity. We just have to think outside the box and remember that we don’t have to feel guilty about not being able to afford certain things or provide lengthy explanations to people.
Oh, and this is a tip for eating out in general. My husband and I have found that most times we can split an entree. Most restaurants will even split the meal for us and bring it out on two separate plates. Entree portions are so large anyway and we either force ourselves to finish a meal and are miserable or we waste food so we just quit ordering our own entrees. This has worked really well for us and we save a lot of $ and are still able to have a treat sometimes. :)
Dee, shame on her friend’s husband for being so miserly and out of line. That’s not what is was and he well knew it. I would have paid exactly what I owed and gotten out of there as well as dropped those “friends.”
angie .. my daughter and i do that all the time .. esp at this one mexican place we enjoy going to .. the portions are so huge that sometimes we split the meal and then bring home leftovers for hubby or son .. so it really is like getting 2-3 meals for the price of one ..
thanks for the advice jill ..
i told my daughter and she said it will be a long time b4 she and this person will “do lunch” again .. she is going to take some of the ideas that angie posted and try that ..
dee ann .. sorry about ur daughter .. i know it must have been hard on her ..
thats what i thought so too lynda but ,, but i guess it could be a learning lesson .. thinking of the positive side of this ..
hopefully dee, your daughter will be very wise and not “do lunch” with them anymore unless of course if she does, when its time to order, let her go last and then state very loudly “mine is on a separate check” ..
maybe that husband will get the “hint” that she isnt paying anymore than what SHE eats! ..
It seems like there are always one or two people who will take advantage of “bill splitting”. When I worked, we had a coworker who was really a nice person, but she felt “entitled” to order an expensive item, every time we went out to lunch as a group. I was a single mom and could not afford to spend a lot on lunch, but it was often designated a “team meeting” and I had no choice but to attend. It is something I had to live with, but still resented.
My husband or his brother always get stuck paying for the dinner of his entire family when there is a get-together. We don’t mind paying for his mom, because she is elderly and is on a low fixed income, however his sister’s husbands never offer a dime, not even helping to pay for the tip. One even brings her daughter and her numerous grandchildren, even though they were not invited. It is frustrating, but some families are just this way and you have to plan for the expense. I would love for my DH and my sweet brother in law to say that they will pay for their mom, but they want separate checks for the others!
You could alwasys explain to your supervisor/friends that eating out in not in your budget or diet, and ask to socialize elsewhere. No one should have to pay for another’s expensive unless they wish to. The people described here are stealing and not your friends. I would insist on seperate checks, ask them to pay their fair share, only order a coke, and at least resort, refuse to dine with them.
We use to be in this situation with my BIL. They would always order pizza at their house, then divide up the cost amoong 5 brothers, making it so that they had NO COST. I finally had enough! After that, I told my husband that whenever they want pizza, we would tell them we just had it at our last meal and didn’t want it. That way, if they went ahead and ordered it, we could run and get our own food and THEY could pay the pizza bill! Yes, it’s a little deceptive, but we wouldn’t be paying for his whole family to eat, while there were just 2 of us, and it saved on my blood pressure! Or, if we ate at a pizza place, my husband and I would order pasta or sandwiches. That fixed that!
My coworkers and I used to go out for lunch quite often. (Monthly) Their children are grown or they have none. I have three, my husband now is off work permanently, I told them that due to circumstances I would no longer be dining with them. They are fine with that.
We have something like this that happens. It is a big thing to the grandparents to get together to eat at a restaurant for _every_ family birthday.
Which in itself, on our budget, gets to be a bit much, but it is something we do for The Family. We are acutely aware that not all of us will always be there, so we make it to the gatherings.
Over the years, we have found that at the favorite restaurants, it is considerably cheaper to order a dinner for a crowd type of deal. With all our children, our “nuclear” family makes up half the number at the table.
Though we are certainly not the highest income at the table, I am always careful to pay half the bill.
Plus the tip, because it really bothered me to see serving staff, in a state where servers don’t get even half of minimum wage, not tipped by some of the families who could well afford to tip properly.
What bothers me, is that though our children eat less than the grown ups at the meals, some of the biggest eaters still mumble about their share of the cost, when really, our family is paying well over half the bill.
Guess it is the cost of peace
I have been known to get just water with lemon just to be with friends. I really don’t have money for eating out. I would rather take a walk. You can talk more while walking or working together than eating. I like accomplishing something more than spending money. Even going out for coffee costs money!
We are treated to most of our restaurant meals. We will order modestly and usually our drink will be water. These are either family meals with Grandpa treating, or volunteer team meals after an event.
I know this sounds cheap, but when it is Dutch treat, we pay our share.
When we were younger and my husband played on a softball team, the team would go to a local restaurant for snacks and beer after the game. As people wanted to, they would throw a few dollars on the table and say that was for their portion and head home. Since my husband was the coach and pitcher, we were most often the last to leave. I can’t count the number of times, the bill was significantly more than the money left on the table and we paid the balance plus a nice tip for the server. You have to when you had a large group like ours. Anyway, after a time, we decided not to be the last ones to leave and always paid our share. After a few other people were left with the bill, it was decided (by group vote) that every so many people would get a separate check. So, this worked out that 2 couples or 4-5 people would have to split a check. Less work for the waitress and easier to really see who owed what. It worked very well. And our purse was much the better for it.
I think the trick to eating with a group is to get the menu before the event and have everyone get an idea as to what their meal should cost so they can bring the correct amount. Also, once you know how much the bill is, there is not the “calculating” at the table that takes so much time. You can pay your portion and head out knowing you have not left someone else holding the bag. Oftentimes, the tip is the problem because you don’t want to stiff the serving staff but people either forget the tax or don’t want to leave a decent tip and the person holding the check gets stuck.
Most of the time we eat out with others, we just ask for separate checks and everything works how fine.
My really good friends and I have a deal when we go out, which isn’t often. We take turns paying the bill. One of my friends has her husband deployed, so she offers to take me and my daughter out, and she’ll treat because it was her idea, and she can afford it easier. If I can afford it, the next time I’ll say it’s my turn. When my husband and I go out in a group, usually good Ole USMC pays because we go out when it’s a shop/bn/company event. But when it’s with friends, we usually try to get 2 tickets, or pay the bill, since we are ordering for 3, not just 1.
my daughter is always treating me .. and everyone else in the car .. i always offer to help pay and she always says “no mom .. i have it” . her heart is as big as the moon, stars and universe .. but i am well aware of her financial obligations (well not all of them but some of them) .. her brother offers to help pay too and she says no to him too ..
well .. last week i told her no more! .. if she was going to argue with me she could .. and yes she did put up a fuss .. so what did i do? i went to walmart with her, her brother got her distracted on something in the store .. and i took her cart and bought her food ..
and when she realized this, she did fuss a bit but i told her that it was our turn to help her and treat her .. fair is fair ..
not that i dont enjoy being treated but its also nice to give back as well ..
and i know she really appreciated it .. her brother told her it was the least we could do bc she always treats us and if there is an emergency she helps us (of course, we pay her back and this has happened only a few times) ..
and yes, her brother even takes her to lunch at times (they work at the same place) or i will bring lunch for her when i get my son after his shift ..
i know she appreciates this and i know she will always try to help us as best as she can (if we ever need it) ..
if the lunch is termed a team meeting then you ask for a receipt and get a tax break either through the company or at tax time.
At least that is the way it is in Canada. It is considered a business expense.
Hi grandma. It’s good to have you back. I was thinking of you just a couple of days ago and was hoping you were doing ok.
Hi Jill and everyone else.
I was in a really bad place since May and didn’t want to talk to anyone. Still not dealing with the world very well but improving.
My kid sister died 2 days before my birthday and her memorial service was on my dads birthday. He passed away 4 years ago from brain cancer as well.
Didn’t get to see my grand daughter as it takes 10 months to get a Canadian passport and they wouldn’t let her into the country. So had to settle for my son and his wife. Nice visit but baby would have been better.
Maybe talking here and giving advice would make it so I start thinking about the world at large again.
starting now to dig up the potatoes I planted and picking the apples from the tree. It is loaded and so apple sauce with the skins so I don’t have to hurt my hands peeling the little things. If nobody eats it I will put it on top of hams as I cook those a lot.
Busy this year for a change with our election campaign going on. Idiots in Toronto call an election during hunting season. Nobody is happy about it.
so I have returned and hopefully I can add some things to your good advice.
Oh Grandma how awful for you. I am so sorry about your sister. To have that heartbreak and then not to get to see your new grand baby. I know how much you were looking forward too that and me being a grandma too I know how much that hurt.No wonder you haven’t been up to posting with us. I was so glad to get to see a picture of your new grand baby. She was a little doll and I know you do miss her so.
I wish there was something we could do to ease things for you but I send my prayers up for you. I don’t say that lightly either because I don’t just automatically say I will pray for someone unless I mean it. It’s not just a platitude with me. I really have been thinking about you. If nothing else be sure to jump in an talk when you can especially if it will help.
I wish I had some of your apples and potatoes to dehydrate. My apple tree produced zero apples this year. Can’t figure out why. I just did a recipe for one of our books and it said to use pumpkin pie spice in your applesauce then to use the applesauce on oatmeal. Says it gives it a really good flavor. I haven’t had a chance to try it yet but does sound so good.
Must go for now. Will be talking to you later. I know it is hard but try to hang in there.
I was wondering what happened to you too Grandma. Hope God brings some healing to your heart.
grandma .. welcome back .. missed you ..
sorry to hear of losing ur sister and your dad .. ((( hugs ))) ..
it is a shame that they wouldnt let the baby into the country .. that would have been a really nice treat for you ..
homemade applesauce? .. mmm .. i cant still “taste” my grandma’s applesauce she made when she was alive .. nothing ia more delish than some homemade applesauce, esp if its with oatmeal ..
i am glad to see ur with us again .. i hope u get to feeling better soon ..
rose
A few years ago when I was in between pay checks-and working on paying off my debt-one of my friends decided she wanted to go out to eat with my sister and I (and her daughter who was under a year at the time).
But the problem was my sister didn’t have any money at all, yet my friend insisted she go to dinner with us. Saying she could pay for her
I knew I couldn’t afford to spend much, so I thought we’d go to McDonald’s or another fast food joint where you could buy a meal for under $5… But, My friend insisted on taking us to Applebee’s despite my protests…
We went to Applebee’s and not only did my sister order one of the more expensive meals on the menu she ordered TWO OF THEM! (One to take home to her fiancé-WHAT!?!)
I was so dumbfounded that she not only ordered something so expensive because she knew someone else was paying for it but she had the nerve to order a second meal for someone who was not there.
I was mortified. I ended up paying $25 dollars plus the cost of the tip so that my friend did not have to pay for my sister’s craziness. I still cringe when I think about that day. Ugh.
When a friend found out about my sister she sent an email and invited me out to lunch or for a coffee just to sit and chat.
Well I accepted but it was my plan to pay. Her husband is retired and lost a good bit of his pension when the company went bankrupt.
Well her husband came as well I still wanted to pay but he knew the waitress and said give me the bill.
I ordered last and saw what they ordered on the menu so I could pick something in the same price range. Also they knew the menu better and would know what was good.
Had a great visit and lunch and I did get the tip.
Now I am tring to get together with them again so we can do lunch with my husband as the men are good friends.
I would love to have them over for dinner or something but she is really allergic to cats and I don’t want to kill her.
Oh well I will figure out some way to say thank you.
by the way I had a toasted club sandwich and french fries which was terrific even better since I haven’t had one in years.
Since my husband and brother-in-law always got stuck with the entire bill when the family got together, we figured out how to avoid that. We figured out how much our meals would be, including any drinks and adding in the tip. When the bill came. Brother in law put his amount, in cash, on the table. My husband did the same, which let the others know that the free ride was over. The others put money, on the table or arranged to pay their share with a credit card. When we decided not enough was on the table, we reminded two of them that they ordered an expensive bottle of wine, and that needed to be covered by them too. It worked! When you go out with people who don’t offer to pay for themselves, make sure you have the cash to pay for your share, and let them pay for their own meals!
Nancy, that is great!
This seems to happen to all of us at least once. So it pays to have a strategy in place before going out.
I think honesty is always best. I’ll tell friends that we’re saving for XX and I’ll be just ordering a bowl of soup, and will request my own check. If I get dropped from a dining out group, all the better, then I don’t even have to have that bowl of overpriced soup. But what I do instead is organize potlucks. I’ve had 2 friends in our group tell me that they are so relieved that I’ve begun doing this, as eating out was hurting them financially as well, but they were afraid to speak up.
So, your honesty may actually be helping someone else, which is always a good thing.
On a related note, we often opt out of group gifts (especially at my husbands office, they have gifts they want us to contribute to every month), and instead give what we think is appropriate, which often is just a card or well wishes.
This is so true. You need to realize everyone else may be feeling the same way you do but are afraid to say anything. I get that all the time on the posts here. I will write about something and so many write to say I feel the same way or finally someone is speak up. It goes back to that spirit of fear. Don’t be afraid of saying anything and always do it kindly and without making a big deal and most won’t think a thing about it.
I found something that worked great recently. I have some cousins that I’m close to so we try to go out maybe twice/yr. We’re all pretty careful with money so no one ever takes advantage of the other. We make a habit of checking the restaurant’s website in advance and then have a good idea of affordability.
We all order similar things and then split the bill. We look out for each other financially so it works great, never any resentment.
I’ve had friends that I changed my social life with so I don’t get stuck with the extra expense. It took some time, but now we’ll go for an ice cream or something inexpensive and if I have friends that take advantage I just don’t go.
For example, I know one of us just bought a condo and is very tight for money, we pick a less expensive place and not make the other person feel self-conscious.
That is what we really should be doing Donna, thinking of the other people and what they can afford. Also when someone else takes you out be considerate then too and don’t think because you are getting a free meal you will buy everything on the menu.
My best friend and I have found ourselves on tight budgets (seem to continue getting tighter..argh…) We use to not think about who would pay the bill- one of us would just grab it. At one point about a year ago we had a conversation about $ situation and realized it had to stop… if only for now. It still feels very strange when we ask for separate checks – and we always acknowledge it to each other. But it also keeps us accountable. We can freely say to each other if we can or cannot afford a particular restaurant, going to a certain store (to avoid impulse buying or the pain that comes just from avoiding it), or the gas for a long haul. We are also watching what we eat and can uncomfortably yet freely talk about it when we are together. The habit has always been buy whatever looks good at the moment. We are training ourselves to think about what will be wise and budgetminded. Difficult but very rewarding and satisfying when we walk out the door! No pain no gain and lasting rewards require discipline! So if you think of us pray!
Sounds like you guys are on the right course. It may seem a little strange and uncomfortable for the moment but any new habit you start feels that way but after awhile you won’t even give it a thought, it will come so natural to you. I know so many people who think nothing of going to an expensive restaurant and then looking at the menu and ordering just what they want not paying attention to the prices at all. Then there are ones like me (and like you now) who just don’t go to certain places to eat and when they do go out they careful look at the menu to see what they can afford and instead of immediately ordering what they want.
You are so right. Discipline does require a little work and is so worth it.